Monday, March 28, 2016

Should Wife put "No Polygamy" Stipulation in Marital Contract

Should Wife put "No Polygamy" Stipulation in Marital Contract
​By: Umm Janna


Whether a wife should put into her marital contract the stipulation that her husband not take a second wife is truly a decision that is left up to her. It has been said by some scholars that it would be better for the prospective wife not to place this stipulation in her marital contract. This is because if her husband desires to marry another wife, he might divorce her without consultation so that he can marry the other wife.

The writer has observed, however, that many men who enter polygamy do so, or at least profess to doing so, because they wish to help women in need  of male companionship and support. This being the case, it is highly unlikely that most men would leave their first wife, merely to help out another woman who is in need if it meant they would have to divorce their first wife. This would defeat their purpose of helping out another woman in need, as their own wife would then be placed into this position.

On the other hand, placing this stipulation into the wedding contract would likely prevent many frivolous marriages that might occur otherwise . . . frivolous marriages that can--and do--put into jeapordy the intact marriage of the original couple. 

Many husbands, prospective additional wives--and even first wives--do not realize how catastrophic polygamy can be for the first wife and her children.

Marriages are an important institution that should be maintained to the utmost by all parties involved. Avoidable acts that make the marriage bond fragile should be just that--avoided. 

Islam of course allows for exceptions to rules during extenuating circumstances. The verse of polygamy, in fact, was revealed surrounding a period of extraordinary circumstances--times of war when there are widows and orphans.

I have no authority to state that this is the only time that polygamy can be practiced. But from my understanding, the context of revelation does have an influence on how rulings are applied, and Allahu Alim. 

The point I am trying to make is that, polygamy is not obligatory. Because of the enormous fitnah and trial that it brings to the first wife and her children, and possible dissolution of the first marriage, it might be prudent for some women to place the above stipulation in their wedding contract. And Allahu Alim.

Grandma Jeddah's Successfull Muslim Marriage provides Muslim mothers with the wisdom and ways to stay married . . . through the difficult times, Insha'Allah. Visit her website and store for more helpful tips on Staying Together

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